what a feeling

it's already few weeks since last i wrote something here..not really in the mood to write,but i think this is the best way to release whatever i feel right now..it should be my sleeping time now, as it's already 1.45 am..maybe because i had a long nap this afternoon, that's why i am not sleepy tonight..but usually i can sleep easily, because i just love sleeping..erm..macam2 perasaan ada sekarang ni, which keep me wide awake, and do whatever i could do to help me calm myself down..

mula2 tadi terkejut when i heard what happened to my friend's mum..i'm very shocked actually..she's supposed to meet her mum at london and bring her mum here to jalan2 and spend about 2 weeks in uk..but suddenly, with Allah's will, her mum got sick and had to be brought to the hospital immediately..can't imagine if i were at her place..i know she must be really sad and worried..but she is very2 strong..ya Allah, give strength to my friend to go through this tough time..

and now her mum is waiting to go back to malaysia..luckily her sis is there too with her mum..when i called her just now, they are waiting for her mum to be discharged from the hospital and they are going to spend the night at malaysian hall..there's nothing can be done at the hospital throughout the weekend and it will only be very costly to stay at the hospital..

i don't know what to do actually..have to wait till tomorrow, after they go to airasia office to amend the tickets and get a new flight to go back to malaysia..then i'll decide what i'm going to do..

and suddenly i remember today's date..that's another reason for me to have this feeling i think..it's 31st July of the year..it might be just another day for anyone else, but it will always be a memorable date for me and my family..7 years ago,he's still here during this date..but that's his last year celebrating his big day (although we dont really celebrate birthdays)..and now he's still here, just not in the form that can be seen, but in our hearts who still remember and pray for him..how i miss my arwah abah..ya Allah, please forgive him and save him from the hellfire..grant him jannah and place him among the right people..amin..

to my beloved abah, happy 57th birthday..even you're no longer here with me, but you will always be remembered..and you'll be forever in my heart..how i miss you abah..may you rest in peace..i'll try my best to be a good daughter who'll pray for you..

to my friend, be strong! i'm sorry for whatever happened between us..but i'm always here for you to shout for any help..

to me myself, just calm down and pray for the best from Allah..